This week's joke

One memory I have of childhood was my dad's Polish jokes. (My mom is Polish, my dad is German.) The tradition has somehow continued in my own family, go figure. So here is the latest, (which makes me laugh).

A Polish man moved to the US and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well. But one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked him the following questions:
Have you any grounds?
Yes, and acre and a half and a nice little home.
No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.
I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have a carport and not need one.
I mean, What are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland.
Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.
Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.
Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.
Why do you want this divorce?!
She going to kill me.
What makes you think that?
I got proof.
What kind of proof?
She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put it on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say:
Polish Remover.