Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Motivation and Fear

Two powerful emotions.

Motivation - I have not had any since April, in the running arena that is. I ran the half-marathon that I trained hard for. And it felt so good. And then, I had nothing to push me out the door, except my own two feet and sometimes my husband's helping hands. So I finally signed up for a 5k in July. Only 11 days away from today. I'm still having a hard time getting moving. It's knowing that my older brother and his son are also running it that gets me out the door now. On those sidewalks that seem to stretch forever, I think of them and tell myself, I can't stop, no walking, because I have got to beat my big brother. I'm pretty sure I can't even keep up with the nephew or his girlfriend, but I can at least move myself with keeping big brother in the dust.

Now, fear. Another biggie. My fear of heights is ... astronomical. If that's possible. I had to walk across a sky bridge yesterday. One I had never been on before. We have some at the mall in our town, but not as high as the one I went on. It was encased in windows on top and the sides, so you could see all over the area. I did not want to go on it. Only because there was an appointment on the other side, and because my son and husband were with me, did I make it across! I reminded myself of the logical side of construction, even while myself imagined what would happen if now was the time for the beams to weaken. I was very very glad to make it to the other side.
We had to go back across it at the end of the appointment, and it wasn't so bad this time. I didn't think too much about it; and then my son, my dear sweet offspring, thought it would be funny for him and my husband to jump up and down in the middle of the bridge. Haha. Hoho. Not laughing. I just kept on walking and pointed out that there was a security camera, and someone was probably having a chuckle.
I wonder how common fear-of-heights is. Does it affect women more than men? What about those who are parents? I have heard theories that if affects someone with children more than one without.

4 comments:

  1. I hate heights. I can't even go up stairs that you can see through, you know, the steps without backs on them. The Man hasn't been too annoying or teasing about it (unlike my fear of dogs, which he doesn't understand even a little bit). At least he has been willing to stand on chairs to change light bulbs or go up the step ladder to wash the top of the car if necessary. Hate heights. Hate them so much.

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    1. I don't like high up bridges either. What I refuse to go over is suspension bridges--those that wiggle up and down when people cross. i will only cross them if I am the only one on it. Greg has to be off or no go because he has bounced them on me. and they have to have a rail of some kind to hang on.

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  2. you are going to have to give me at least a head start of 10 seconds for each year of age difference. T

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    1. Two minutes, that's what you get ;) Aw, you'll probably beat me anyway

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