Keeping Young

Today - A five mile bike ride with the two oldest kids. Up hills (ouch on the quads) and down hills - nice breezes!
I've come to the conclusions that I am fully a mom. (~Yeah, 5 kids later and it hits me.~) As we were heading down a long steep hill - of which there are many in our neck of the woods - I saw my two children ahead of me flying down without their brakes on. And I got queasy. I also flew down the hill, but with my brakes on all the way down. As I started to get faster my stomach told me - Don't! and I would brake to slow wayyyy down. It was then that it hit me.
As a child I would fly down the hills with my brother, not caring about broken arms, broken heads, blood or other painful possibilities. I would enjoy the wind and the feeling of speed as if I were really flying; Just as my kids were doing right in front of my eyes.
But now ... now I brake. I slow down. I think of all the 'what if's' instead of flying down the hill. There's a parallel to life here. I am cautious, considering all the angles of what could go wrong, or what could happen, while the kids going flying down the hill, enjoying the wind on their faces, and the thrill of speed in the moment. It's what a mom does, because if she didn't there could be more pain than joy in the event. Of course, finding the balance is always the key. Balancing the flying and the braking, the cautiousness and the 'let it fly' spontaneity.
All that from a bike ride with my kids. wow.

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